“But I say, walk by the Spirit, and you will not carry out the desire of the flesh. For the flesh sets its desire against the Spirit, and the Spirit against the flesh; for these are in opposition to one another, so that you may not do the things that you please.”
– Galatians 5:16-17
I have written on here about the importance of being led by the Holy Spirit, it’s something that cannot be understated.
But how, specifically, can living a spirit-led life help your marriage?
If you’re married, your marriage is in trouble, or you believe your marriage is not as good as it could or should be, have you ever given any thought to the idea that many of your problems could come from the fact that you might not have a real relationship with God and that you and your spouse might not be living biblical, spirit-led lives?
Think about it for a minute.
Do you and your spouse have real, intimate, personal, and passionate relationships with Him?
Are your behaviors, attitudes, and thinking biblical?
Are you spirit-led?
Or, are you emotion-led and childish?
Although you and your spouse may be church members who attend church on a regular basis, are your relationships with God all that God requires them to be?
Do you lean on God, rely on God, and allow yourselves to be led by the Holy Spirit?
Think about the most recent negative interaction you had with your spouse.
Was it the result of something you did? Be honest there is a good chance it was you, acting or reacting un-biblically?
Is this normal in your home?
Is this adult, spirit-led behavior or childish, selfish, feelings-led behavior?
Children, not adults, are motivated by feelings. Feelings driven reactions are what children to use to get what they want and the main reason they act out when they don’t get what they want.
That being the case, can a person truly say they have entered adulthood until they learn to follow Biblical principles in spite of where their feelings are leading them? Is it fair to even assume spiritual children can even have successful marriages?
As Christians, we must learn what it means to grow up and be controlled by the Holy Spirit in everyday interactions with our spouses. Unfortunately however, a good number of married couples behave as though they are children in adult bodies.
Is this you? Is this why your marriage is suffering?
Although you and your spouse may have decent educations and good careers, there is a good chance you have stopped growing emotionally and spiritually a long time ago or have never learned how to grow emotionally and spiritually to begin with.
When you or your spouse feels angry, do you act angry? If so, how does your spouse react?
If lying or deceitfulness serves you, do lie and deceive? If so, how does your spouse react?
Do either of you ever say whatever comes to mind thereby showing your spiritual and emotional immaturity or do you guard your tongue and speak with a spirit of understanding and forgiveness? If you say whatever you feel, how does your spouse react?
Don’t get the wrong idea here, I am not naive enough to say that even the best Christian marriages are 100 percent perfect 100 percent of the time; we are all people, we all have problems, and we are all hard to live with at times.
What I am saying is that, unless we learn to say “yes” to Biblical principles, learn how to be Spirit controlled people, and learn how to say “no” to childish emotions (at least most of the time), we will never learn how to properly deal with our marital issues, and have happy, God-centered, grown-up marriages.